Joanna Faith Wright's Adoption Day! Loads of pics!!!!!

 Wake up Joanna TODAY is your Adoption Day!!!!!!!!  As you can see she was thinking she should be Sleeping Beauty instead of Princess Joanna today :)

 She was much happier by the time we made it to the lawyer's office a couple of hours later.....

 Here are some of the others waiting for the lawyer so we could walk a few blocks to the court house. 

 It's a miracle- they are all looking and have smiles!!!!  Awwww- are they not the cutest ever???  Love all of my babes!!!!!!

 Joanna telling Daddy she loves him and can't wait for the judge to get this thing rolling :)

 A little silliness going on....                                              Look at our oldest 4- so adorable!

 Sarah (the young lady who works for us) and the girls waiting with smiles!!!!!

 Looking out the windows waiting....

 More silliness because that is how we roll.......

 Hanging out with hugs :)

 It's OFFICIAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Joanna Faith Wright is ours FOREVER!!!!!  Well actually she has always been God's, but we get to be her family here on Earth anyway!!!!!!!!  :)

 The judge kept the children captivated telling them all about his exotic fish in his office chambers....

 Abigail  - how do you feel about adopting Joanna???  :)

 Hey, daddyo now you are stuck with me forever isn't that the best?

 YES it is!!!!!

 Mommy excitedly holding the adoption decree!!!!  Joanna trying to grab it :)  I think she wants to proofread it you know just to make sure it is all properly done.

 Mommy, Daddy, and our baby girl together OFFICIALLY FAMILY!!!!!!

 Eating at Chili's to CELEBRATE!!!!!!!  Where in a couple of minutes we met up with Kati & Vicky too!!!!! 

 Joanna actually letting Sarah hold her.  If you have been around Joanna recently you would know she has had a severe case of stranger danger.  Which is great in that she is totally bonded to us :), but no fun for other people that really love her....that would listen to her cry anytime they came close :(  She just had to make sure that no one would take her from her wonderful family :)

 Joanna- you are sooo much cuter than the baby on the box!!!  Here is your present what do you think?  Of course you were there when we bought it.....and after the torture of not getting to play with it until today :) 

 Ok how many pieces does this thing have??

 Hmmm.......is this a present for the big kids or for Joanna???

 Ok time for a little cupcake complete with swirled pink and white icing, princesses wrappers, and crowns on toothpicks......

 Hmmm....this tastes ok...

 Let me see.....if daddy did a good job or not?

 Yeah, this is pretty good.

 Here is my table of guests......

 Back to me.....I could really get used to this stuff....

 I love the feel of it.

 See how the frosting just squishes between your fingers.....

 Check me out...

 Oh YEAH! 

 Now it is really fun to make this mess and mommy isn't even stopping me!

 Oooppppsss here comes mommy saying that I need a bath or something.....(don't worry I am only almost 8 months and really only ate about one mouthful....but boy did I have fun squishing it in my fingers!!!!)

 I think I am just fine, but I like bath time in the sink anyway.... for all my adoring fans check out the cute baby chub on my legs!!!  I am yummier than cupcakes :)

 I finally get to play with my new toy.

 Oh you push this and it makes music, and the balls start popping out...

 I need a closer inspection.

 Awww...look at me I am getting sleepy and I found a cuddle buddy!!!

These are my new friends who traveled over 7 hours out of their way to be with us today- just for my special day!!!!!  Thank you sooo much.....you made my mommy & daddy sooo happy just knowing you would do that for us!  Special love to Vicky & Kati!!!!!!!  Can't wait to see you next month :)

So in case you couldn't tell my Adoption Day was AWESOME!!!!  I mean what more could you want?  I have my FAMILY, LOTS OF LOVE, SPECIAL FRIENDS, GREAT FOOD, PINK PRINCESS CUPCAKES, & A NEW TOY- LIFE IS WONDERFUL!!!!!!  Hope your day was as fun as mine :)  By the way tomorrow I turn 8 months....and soon my mommy will get around to telling you all my new skills!

Take The Limits Off!

This is a VERY EXCITING POST!!!  Go read all about it.....  HERE!!!!

Weekend camp went really well we had a lot of God working on hearts happening!!!  Praise God!!!!!

Tomorrow is our Big Day- Joanna's Adoption Day and we can't wait!!!!!!!  Pictures to follow :)

Gifts.......

 So guess what we got for our family gifts this year for Christmas?  What it's too early for that? 

 Oh- you forgot we don't do traditional traditions...he he he.....yeah that's how we roll here at the Wright home.  So one- was our new kitty Rascal (and yes he lives up to his name!!)

 The second is a video game.  I am usually NOT for video games just so you know.  I actually loathe them for the most part.  But the thought of getting up, playing some friendly fun family games together, encouraging each other, being active together, and learning more about being a good sport.........liked this idea.....

 And so do our children.  So we got a Wii* and it is FUN!!!  We have laughed, had fun, interacted a lot, reminded each other how to lose gracefully, and learned fine motor control......together! 

 For those of you who don't know our family Christmas traditions do not revolve around gifts on Christmas Day, but family activities that we do together throughout the season.  As reminders that our family is important!  We typically buy family games, books, etc.  For Christmas- but not really at Christmas....if that makes sense.  Well, you know we are not a typical family :)  he he he....that is an understatement!!!

 Ok so I actually "stole" this idea from another blogger and here is our version of it- a Thankful Wreath!  Yeah, well we had to make it a bit bigger - he he he- ok a LOT bigger.  What can I say- lots of people, lots of thankfulness, and it takes up lots of space :)

 And YES you are ALL included!!!!!!  Some other things included- clean water, family, God, sharing Jesus, clothes, fun rides at theme parks, health, Wii*, all our pets by name of course, birth families, and much much much more....

 OK so my last post was me feeling a bit depressed about things.....and yet God gave us 2 wonderful people who are going to be driving hours out of their way to visit us on Joanna's Adoption Day next Monday!!!!  Kati & Vicky who are friends of our bloggy friends (whom we have gotten to visit with a couple of times) are coming to help us celebrate!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  I can't even say how much this means to us......when I first read the e-mail tears poured down.  

 The Lord heard my cries, and has given us friends- to help us celebrate!!!!  And this is how we feel about it!

And just because this is a really cute girl- here is another cute pic!!!!!

The only thing that leaves me sad is that there are too many of "us" out there!  Why???  And all I can say is thank God for Blogland!!!!  Thank you all for lifting us in prayers, for loving us, for caring enough to support us on this crazy journey, for knowing and "getting it" :)  It means more than you will ever know!

I also want to add that I am Thankful for this precious gift of life that God has given.  For the road no matter how hard it seems sometimes.  For all the road blocks, ups, and downs......because without it all we would not be who we are, and we would not have our family! 

**Prayer request- this weekend as in starting tomorrow we have several campers coming jr/sr high weekend camp!!!!  Praying hearts will be CHANGED!!!!!!!!

Thinking.....

Joanna & I are back from Florida where we said goodbye to a lively, wonderful, crazy, fun - loving cousin Heather.  The impression from my other cousin Ryan was right on in that she loved with wreckless abandon!  She never held back, and hurt many times because of it, but it didn't stop her from loving more and more deeper and deeper- to everyone around her.

Lately I have been in a rut of general sadness about life in general.  I long for something more.  I long for friends that call just to see how it's going.  For friends who understand that we adore our children.  For someone to be really excited about our adoption next Monday.  And not that bloggy friends aren't AWESOME- BECAUSE YOU ARE!!!!  But there won't be anyone really that even says anything to us next Monday besides the young lady who works with us.  Seriously- there won't be cards in the mail or anything that is said.  It makes me wish and desire so strongly to have family near by.  It makes me just want friends.  It's a sad pity party.

Do you know that we have never even had a "baby or child" shower for any of our 8 children?  When my cousin heard this she- at HER OWN SHOWER for Jessa- bought me some gifts.  How sweet is that?  It made me realize how much I have missed that.  NOT presents!  I could care less about that....but friends to be happy for you and excited for you.

So there you have it my pity party. 

ON to life in general.  Trying to get back into the swing of things.  Planning for this upcoming weekend as we have weekend camp for jr/sr high.  EXCITED to have a chance to witness again.  To see these young people yearn for Christ- THAT IS HAPPY!!!

So there you have it- a real, pathetic, glimpse of my life.  Sometimes it just isn't that exciting....now I just need to go kick myself in the pants, pull myself up by the bootstraps, and get over it!  Ahhhh......life......

Announcing Joanna's Adoption!!!!!

Hi there - this is Jason writing on behalf of our family.  Dawn is in Florida with family celebrating the life of her cousin Heather, and is not able to be "connected" as she usually is, so I have the joy of posting while she's away!

Joanna has been such a blessing to our family.  Our journey to child number 8 was one of much heartache.  We were not able to bring home our Naomi (See our post about Naomi here), but God opened up a door for us amidst our loss and sadness.  A door with much rejoicing on the other side!  See our "Journey To Joanna" Part 1, Part 2 & Part 3.  Within days of signing up with Christian Adoption Consultants, with Tracie Loux as our consultant, and working with Mother Goose Adoptions, we were in Philadelphia, PA holding our precious baby girl angel!

From the time we knew we weren't bringing Naomi home I could see a sadness in Dawn's eyes.  I know it sounds silly, but she lost some of the sparkle.  When God turned our "wailing into dancing" (Psalm 30:11), He did it in style:

• Not only did He give us the gift of a child we so yearned for, but He made it happen in a matter of hours!!!
• He placed Tracie in our lives, who is now such an awesome friend.
• He provided a warm and loving home with Brian and Dorean Beattie (Friends of Tracie) where Dawn and Joanna could stay and be loved until being allowed to leave Pennsylvania (And it just happened to be that Dorean is a gifted photographer and took some beautiful pictures of a mommy and her new baby!)
• He opened up a door to fly Dawn and Joanna down to Houston in First Class for the same price as Economy.
• He gave us the gift of a home to stay in until we could come back to Louisiana - the home of a wonderful couple (who had never met us before either) to stay with over Easter Weekend no less, so we could be be together as a family!  The couple are the parents-in-law of Nell Ann Galindo, who with her husband Justin adopted a gorgeous little boy from Ethiopia through All God's Children, as we did our Jonathan.

There were many blessings - God is SO good isn't he? but the true icing on the cake for me as a husband was to see my wife get that sparkle back.  Others might not see it specifically, but I can see it in her face in these pictures taken when Joanna was just days old.

Dawn took this herself the first day she held Joanna

One of the pictures taken by Dorean

I took this picture the day I arrived in Philadelphia

Me holding Joanna for the first time

One of the most awesome moments in the life of a mommy or daddy is when you hold your child for the first time.  Dawn was able to take pictures of me with Joanna the first time I held her (You can see I still have my bag over my shoulder) as I stepped into the lobby of our hotel.  What went through my mind, and what continues to go through my mind when I hold her now is how special children are.  They are special to us because they are a new life created in God's image, with eternal worth, with a purpose, with unique gifts and personality, and a reminder of God's blessing in our life EVERY day! 

Those of us who have or will be adopting, and those who are passionate about God's heart for adoption know how sweet the day is when you finally have that adoption decree in your hands. So, please join with us in celebrating the adoption of Joanna on the 22nd.  We so wish that all of our dear and precious blog friends who have been part of our journey could be with us to celebrate in person, and we know that that isn't possible, but you are welcome to be part of our day - we would love to see you!

We value, appreciate and treasure your prayers, support and encouragement - THANK YOU!   Praying you all can experience and see that "sparkle" in your life and in the faces of those you love.
God Bless,

Jason

Will be away for a bit....

Just a quick note to say that tomorrow morning I will be flying to Florida with Joanna on my hip of course.  I will be staying with family during this time of sorrow and celebration for my cousin Heather's life.  So if I am not blogging or reading your blogs- which is very fun :)  you know why.  I will try to keep you updated, and will be back at least by next week.

Please join in prayer for my whole family as the grieving is a hard process......will miss my crazy red headed cousin.  She has so much love of children, life, and passion running through her.

Of course also pray for my sweet husband who is allowing me to go be with family---which means he has the other 7 children for almost a week.  He has not been away from me or Joanna for this long.....and I know he will need support- please pray :)  We will deeply miss them all as well (this mommy is rarely without the whole crew!!!!!!!)

Abigail's Birthday....a new kitten....and prayers please....

 So my heart is bursting with JOY for my Abigail who turned 11 years old today!!!  Happy Birthday Abigail Marie Wright!!!!  I want to take time to share with you who she is.  If you have been in our home any time in the past month or more- you would have known today was her birthday because every day she has been counting down...reminding us about her upcoming birthday and telling us that she is excited about her cheesecake!  She loves:  pink, fluffy things, painting her nails, smelling pretty, wearing skirts, drawing, and doing anything girly!  She has a love in her heart from the Lord and reads her Bible daily- reminds me that I need to do so also.  She has a huge smile!  She loves to share and be generous with what she has. 

 So today her presents- cards, money, a book on how to draw, a whole pack of cotton candy smelling bath salts, oils, and soaps, lip gloss, and of course fingernail polish, as well as a book- Stellaluna.  She loved it.  In fact she loved it so much she took time to write, color, and create a card for Daddy & Mommy!  She is of course a daddy's girl :). 

 Yep, just like daddy- sniffing everything :)  he he he.  I think the thing that I see in Abigail that reminds me of her Heavenly Father is her willingness to do whatever is needed.  When you ask her to help you- she smiles and says- sure....even if it isn't her favorite thing to do.  She can have attitude- can't we all?  But, that really isn't who she is.  She has the most beautiful spirit and I know that is a true gift from God!  Thank You God for our precious gift.  She is such a Blessing!!!!! 

 Here is our crew waiting on the oreo cheesecake!  YUMMY!!!!  My girl has great taste! 

 Can you see the smile?  The excitement!!!!!  She is soo happy for her special day.  That she gets to have a few gifts, spend time with her family, and enjoy some cheesecake. 

 Yep, that's my girl!  She amazes me so much....and we have learned much from her.  We pray that God will continue to grow you Abigail in the way you should go.  To continually Bless you with His Heart for others!

 In other news......our cat Sylvester had to be put to sleep after we came home from our vacation to FL.  It was a very sad day as he was such a great cat.  He had only been with us 5 years....but became very very sick.  Although you wouldn't know it for the most part.  He was in a lot of pain...........

 So we decided to bring another cutie kitten into a loving home- Rascal is his name!  He really just choose us when we went to the cat shelter in town.  He is adorable, has done very well with the kids, and with Teddy our indoor dog.  The kids are really enjoying him!

For your viewing pleasure here is Abigail entertaining Joanna- She loves her very very much!!!!!  Swinging her around on her hip.  I just love that God has blessed us  :)

Prayers Please:

So this morning we got a phone call from my cousin Heidi (remember her recent baby being born- Jessa).....well  her sister Heather passed away this morning.  She had had a heart attack last week, but was getting better and was sent home to rest before doing any other procedures to help her heart.

My crazy red headed cousin was a blast to hang out with, and she had a deep love for children!  Please pray for all the family...including her husband Jackson, mother Jane, brother Ryan, sister Heidi, and all the children because they adored her and are struggling.  As well as the children she nannied for- who of course adored her too.  We will miss her greatly, but know that she is dancing with Jesus!!!!

Changing our Hearts......

This month is of course November- and we all know what that means....Thanksgiving, turkey, family, fall, pumpkins, leaves, little pilgrims, and the list goes on.......

And if you are around anyone who has adopted, is adopting, or is on fire about adoption in general- you may also know that it happens to be Orphan Sunday today....and Adoption Month.

These are all things to.... well.... help us recognize Thankfulness in our lives.  BUT- sometimes there is something missing.  You see it isn't that these things are great, but that when we get on with our New Year our hearts are the same.  We in essence spend the next couple of months being thankful, hanging out with our families, eating way too much food, going to start running it off at the treadmill.....yadda yadda yadda.......

So what is missing?  A TRULY THANKFUL HEART!  One that says my treasure is NOT here on this Earth!  My treasure is in Heaven and therefore the ONLY thing I can boost in is Jesus Christ.  HE IS MY THANK YOU!  There really isn't anything else.....it all only points back to God.  Thankful for our food- why?  Because if we have ever had to cry over not being able to buy a gallon of milk because we have run out of money- we know that GOD alone is our provider.  Thankful for our children- why?  Because we know that God is the miracle worker that CREATED our child in the womb.  Thankful for..........

How can we truly develop a THANKFUL HEART?  One that doesn't come and go with the calendar year?

One way is to play the Glad Game (which I have mentioned on my blog before).  It is from the movie Polyanna- we like the really old version :).  It is where an orphan recalls living with her parents who were missionaries.  She really wanted a doll, but when the "missionary barrels" came all she got was a pair of crutches.  Her father encouraged her to play the Glad Game and be glad that she didn't have to use them.  Seems a bit harsh because after all she was just a little girl, but later when she became an orphan.....and was thrown into a situation that was less than perfect she remembered it.  It was a part of who she was.  She wasn't a hard hearted little brat who didn't care about others- quite the opposite.

Later in the movie when talking with the pastor- she talked about the Glad passages in the scriptures.  Pointing out that there are hundreds and hundreds of passages that talk about being glad.  So why do we still have problems seeing that our hearts need to change?  Well we blame it on hurried schedules, too much to do, and NOT ENOUGH OF WHAT WE WANT.

In an effort to change this in ourselves- because YES I AM PREACHING TO ME TOO!!  We have started enforcing a rule in this home.  If you start pouting because you are asked to do the laundry (or complain over anything really)- you GET to sing this song:

Thank you Lord for ____________(laundry to fold), Thank you Lord for __________, Thank you Lord for _________right where we are.  Hallelujah Praise the Lord, Hallelujah Praise the Lord, Hallelujah Praise the Lord right where we are.  **To really get into it everyone joins in and we all clap and dance around :)

We also try to play the glad game as often as we can as well as making sure we don't get wrapped up in ourselves- with plenty of learning about people world wide who would give anything for 1/1000 of what we have.  This is not a one month deal, but a lifetime of learning.  If Paul in scriptures can do it- so can we!

To help us all here is a Glad passage:

Psalm 113  Shout praises to the Lord!  Everyone who serves him, come and praise His name.  Let the name of the Lord be praised now and forever.  From dawn until sunset the name of the Lord deserves to be praised.  The Lord is far above all of the nations; he is more glorious than the heavens.
No one can compare with the Lord our God.  His throne is high above, and He looks down to see the heavens and the earth.  God lifts the poor and needy from dust and ashes, and He lets them take part in ruling His people.  When a wife has no children, He blesses her with some, and she is happy, Shout praises to the Lord!

What else do you do or can we do to change our minds, hearts, and attitudes?

Encouragement!

So I have been thinking a lot lately about how we - well at least me- LOVE to be encouraged!  Encouraged in adoption, being a mommy, being a wife, being a God Follower, being our best for HIS SAKE.

I wanted to share my heart on something that I really really feel is very important.  READING YOUR BIBLE :)

So now that some of you may be shaking in your boots already....let me share my story of how I came to really start reading scriptures.  It actually started with a bloggy friend not that long ago.  You see I have read the Bible through.....once.  I have on and off started and stopped....... been frustrated... told myself there are some complicated parts so skip those.... made the excuse of not enough time..... oh well- started the year off great, but now am too far behind so just give up.....AGAIN .....and well a lot of other excuses.

I think it has to do with the fact that we don't really understand God and it seems so well you know "a big idea" to comprehend and we give up.  DON'T!  My bloggy friend suggested that she was going to start reading the Bible in 90 days.  I gulped at the thought of 90 days when I hadn't in a whole year for a long time.  Something inside me though said - oh come on if you have others doing it too it will help you......so I DID IT!  Well, ok not in 90 days, but in about 120.

There were days when I didn't want to- that is my flesh talking here!  There were days when I struggled with the meaning!  BUT when I had finished those 120 days I knew for sure I should never stop reading through the scriptures EVER!!!!  I am not just talking doing your Bible Studies with the other people in your groups- not that it is wrong in fact it is most definitely GREAT.  The problem is if you are not reading through ALL that God wants you to know and hear.  You can't begin to understand what you don't even read or pray over.

In the last year and then some I have gained sooo much more now that I have already read it.  Now when reading it is more familiar.  When I read certain passages that are not "common" they are not hard for me to read through because I have read them before.  Now they seem well at least readable, and I am getting little nuggets of what God wants me to hear from Him.

So here are some Bible reading hints from me to you!
1- Pick a plan.  There are tons!!!  Search the internet you can read chronologically, the "old fashion" way, or there are plans that do different "sections" for different days of the week.
2-  Don't be afraid to FAIL.  Yes I said FAIL!!!  It is ok to miss....you are not going to get an F on this test unless you don't do anything.  So WHEN you FAIL.....take a deep breath and start back in where you left off.  Remember if it takes you 4 years to read the Bible through at least you are doing it!!!!!!
3-  Pick your spot & time!  Like anything we really like to do (like blogging).  It works best if we have a time that we usually blog or usually do laundry, etc.  Do you like to read from your computer, or from an old family Bible, or one given to you as a gift?  Stick to it :) as much as possible.
4-  PRAY!  For those of you who may be like me and not be an expert on Hebrew, Greek, and word origins- yeah.....well I rely on lots of prayer and study notes to get me through.  Sometimes it takes time to truly understand, but WOW oh WOW is it worth it!

If you would have told me a few years ago that I would look forward to Bible reading time...yeah, wouldn't have believed you, but I do!  I am no where near perfect....I miss days......I still don't get a lot of why did God say this or what does this have to do with my faith kinds of questions, but I keep plugging away.  And you know what some of those things are being answered bit by bit.

Also if you like to journal- do it!  It will help you even more :)  So BE ENCOURAGED!!!!!!

***And just for fun take a highlighter and highlight how many times in the Bible it talks about orphans and widows......yeah that will wake you up to how serious God wants us to take our job of caring for the poor and needy!  :)  Also things like anything to do with wife, mother, family in general.  There are just sooo many things to learn :)

Open, Semi- Open, and Closed Adoption & Adoption Date for Joanna

 So this is a continuance of my domestic adoption post - People ask all the time what are the differences between open, semi-open, and closed adoptions.  So I am going to give you some definitions that are pretty accepted in domestic adoptions.

Closed adoption- this is where there is NO contact whatsoever between the birth family and the child or baby even as the child is growing up.  There is no exchange of contact information and you may not even know who the birth mom's name is, have a picture, or know anything about them whatsoever.  Most overseas adoptions are closed (except some programs now such as the Ethiopia program are pleased to have birth family meeting and happy to pass along pictures etc. to the families, but this is not the norm).

Closed adoption is also a protection for children that need to NOT be exposed to the birth family for safety concerns.  Sometimes this option is ok with these situations because obviously the children need to be protected even at the cost of not having that relationship.

In my opinion these are the only two situations when adoption should be closed.  I think even if it is minimal contact- there should be something.  If for no other reason than just a curiosity that all children will have about the birth family.  That is my opinion- you don't have to agree.  I have had several families that have adopted overseas and really mourned the fact that they can't tell anything to them about the birth family.  Breaks my heart because most of the time they LOVE their families, but just want to see if they look like their birth mom or have any of their traits....simple curiosity.  Or they want to know that they are safe and ok.

On to Semi-Open...this is when you send ongoing pictures, letters saying what the children are doing at different stages, and you may even have open electronic lines- like e-mails, facebook, or blogs.  Most times you meet the family at the child's birth or shortly after the consent forms are filled out for parental termination. This is what we have with all of our children's birth families.  This is a pretty comfortable place to be.  You get to share some things online, or with letters & pics.  We tend to do this at least twice a year, with more often in the beginning.  Eventually when our children are older we have made it very clear that they are able to choose getting to visit their birth families.  We have had pictures of the birth families on the wall.  We keep our conversations open about the birth families.  We are happy to say things in our home like- oh you have _________'s smile.

The thought of this sometimes scares the mess out of people, but I want to emphasize that once you get passed the "scary" first meeting.....it is a great way to make sure your children don't feel that rejection as strongly.  It is something you can be open about.  Let me also state that the birth family is usually JUST AS NERVOUS as you are.  Imagine for a few minutes how it feels to know that you LOVE YOUR CHILD SOOOOOOO  MUCH!!!  You have viewed profiles or been told a family has been found for your child....then you have/get to meet them.  Sometimes for the first time - the day your child is born!  I mean- talk about pressure.  You wonder......do they think that I am a loser?  Do they think I am just to incompetent to raise my child?  Will they tell my child horrible things about me as they grow up?  What will they really think about me?

I don't know about you, but that list crosses my mind as I think of our birth families........I want to MAKE SURE they know that NONE of that is true.  ****I also want to say that in the case of foster care sometimes it is a GOOD thing to have a break before having any ongoing relationship.  Sometimes I believe you can cause more damage by trying to start anything right away - on the child's behalf.  As in we have always written the letters, and sent the pics.  At first we didn't make a big deal about it....because just months prior our children had "mental breakdowns" over having to have visits with them.  So you do have to judge this for your child's mental safety as well.

I would say that sometimes our feedback has not been positive.  REMEMBER the birth family is hurting!  This is a time to show grace and mercy....not throw stones!  We have received plenty of negative letters from one of our birth families.  This was an opportunity for us to show Jesus to her and resist any urge to be snotty back.  We simply sent our usual letters and pics as if we had never received anything hurtful from her.  You know what- just lately we have received some very nice letters from her :)  Praising God for this!  It is HIM who works things out and our job is to do our best.

Then there are open adoptions.  These are something hard to do.  They are not for the faint of heart.  My cousin's family has an open adoption with both birth families....and it is sometimes heartbreaking.  They have media contact, phone contact, as well as visits.  Now this can of course only happen when you live at least somewhat locally.  Which for most of our birth families....we don't.  So it is hard to have any twice yearly or less or more often visits with them when they live pretty far away.  We do plan on visiting birth families - when we are able to visit these other states in the future.

The tricky part with this is there is A LOT OF TRUST to do this kind of adoption.  Sometimes it is not easy because a comment is made....and it can cause hard feelings.  Although sometimes it can be very beneficial- but it depends solely on how the "adults" handle it as well.  It can be well done if you put the effort in.  Of course for us - it is a cross between semi-open and open.  There are many options in between :)

So you need to figure out what you are comfortable with.  One of our birth moms didn't want ANY contact, but after meeting her at the hospital.....that all changed.  Now we have her number, and she has our blog address, and we are able to send pics and letter directly to her :)  So sometimes it changes....and that is fine if both  "parties" are good with that :)

I would say the most important part- is the children!  What is beneficial for them.  If you are having issues dealing with something it can have a negative effect- not good.  HOWEVER- if you are willing to really put your effort into it- IT CAN MAKE A HUGE DIFFERENCE IN THE LIFE OF YOUR CHILD!!  In their bonding to you, in their security, and in who you are as a parent.  :)

**WE HAVE A COURT DATE FOR OUR OFFICIAL ADOPTION OF JOANNA- NOVEMBER 22, 2010!!!!!!  9:30AM :)  We couldn't be more thrilled.  YEAH!!!!!

****Please continue praying for the Loux Family!!!  If you don't know - little Mattie (newborn) has a very severe infection and is on very heavy medications in the hospital.  They are having to drive to St. Louis from Kansas City- yikes and they have 6 other children. 

****My other cousin (not Heidi who just had her newly adopted baby girl Jessa)- Heather has been taken to the hospital.  She hadn't been feeling well....and now has been told she had a heart attack.  They are doing some procedures now.  Please pray for her husband Jackson and her family & friends.

**** We also have a couple of unspoken prayers too....thanks!

Have a Blessed time seeing who we have put into the houses.  HOPE you voted!!!!!!!  So important to pass this very very very important privilege to our children!!!!!  :)