8 years ago- Happy Adoption Day Joshua, Sarah, & Elizabeth!

8 years ago..... we stood up in court and said yes to being their family.  It seems like yesterday and yet a long time ago.  Even in the hardest moments of our family I would say yes again and again! 

Elizabeth is our always smiling songbird.  She loves to play with Legos with her huge imagination and play outside in the dirt making mud pies and all sorts of fun things.  She is "full on" all the time and it feels like she may have the capability to be in two places at once.  She loves to squeeze you tight with her bear hugs.  I love listening to her play and thinking of the amazing plans God has for her life! 

Adoption can be beautiful and joyful as well as hard and painful.  The past 8 years have proven that and although our lives here on Earth are not perfect it reminds me of the song My Story by Big Daddy Weave.  Their story will be beautifully written by God including details that are hard and wonderful all mingled together. 

Sarah loves studying fashion, painting her fingernails, and reading especially American Girl.  She loves leading worship and I truly believe God has and will continue to grow her gifts in this area.  She is almost as tall as I am, but I won't admit it yet.  This young lady is going to challenge the world and take it on.  She has a way of caring for those who don't have a voice and is quick to make friends with anyone. 

Sometimes the stories God writes are not the ones you expect.  They aren't easy for sure and your hearts get broken.  You feel like God must have made a mistake or He must just not really know your capabilities.  Questions come by the bucket load as you feel like nothing fits or it just isn't the way it is supposed to be.  But one thing remains- God is still God and He hasn't left His Throne.  So buckle up and lean into HIM!

This amazing young man is so compassionate.  He loves to play with his youngest siblings and wrestle all day (and I do mean all day) with his brothers.  He has a definite soft spot for others and is protective.  He doesn't say a whole lot, but when he does it matters to him.  He has developed a passion for running and has been inspired by Jesse Owens.  I can't wait to see what God does with him!

I know that I know that God will use all our stories together to show his Glory.  Even when it is hard to see in the moments of the everyday. 

We are more than blessed to call these three beautiful young people our children.  We are thrilled that our lives came together.  If you told me in the beginning that everything would be the way it is I wouldn't have believed you.   

Some people ask us if we always planned to have a large family.  I would say not really.  It just happened.  We said yes to foster care.  We said yes to adoption when the time came.  It was something we just leaned hard into God and said we will say yes- and let you take care of the outcome.  It was crazy hard because our human side gets caught up.  We want to plan it, but we can't.  Only God sees the ending and we are clueless. 

What makes it all work?  I am still clueless. 

There are many days I look at these smiles and think - how do we do this?

Sometimes you just have to take a deep breath and whisper a prayer and ask God continually for help.  To say I want what you want God- please I am begging for you to show me, and Thank God for every day you get to spend with your children!

Adoption And Good Excuses

Meet Jon & Angel (our clients through Christian Adoption Consultants):  

This is their story of adoption and well meaning excuses.....

Adoption had been on our hearts for years, starting very early in our marriage.  However, we kind of set it aside as we had our 3 biological children.  When our youngest turned 3, God really started to prompt us again to start the adoption process.  However, we had excuse after excuse.  Good excuses we thought.  We told God that we would do it, BUT....once we had so much money in savings, and once Jon's job slowed down, etc, etc. etc.  We basically were putting God in a box setting such tight parameters around our adoption situation. 

But guess what?  I don't think God always works that way.  I think he often waits for us to take the first step purely out of faith, before He'll start opening doors.   One morning when I was sitting down doing my quiet time reading "Jesus Calling," by Sarah Young, God spoke to me loudly!  He told me that He gets it.  He understand that WE can't do it.  But...HE CAN!!!  He told me to go for it!  The next day we committed to starting our adoption journey.  Our first step was calling Dawn from Christian Adoption Consultants.

Dawn and Jason were and ARE amazing!!  We had no clue how the domestic adoption world worked.  We've spent months talking to friends who have been through the process, but what we quickly found out was that every situation was so different.  Dawn was there for me, patiently answering all of my 2000+ questions, making the hard journey so much smoother.  Not only was she informative, knowing all of the facts, but she was so understanding, helping calm my heart and nerves on numerous occasions.  They've been there.  They get it!!  What I loved most about them was their PROMPTNESS in replying to calls and emails.  It was almost immediately that they'd get back to me, which is huge for me.  They truly were a blessing to me and my family.

As I sit her typing, my sweet baby boy, Brady, is napping.  He's 7 months old already.  He's the HAPPIEST BABY EVER!!  He's known by everyone as being the baby who smiles ALL OF THE TIME!  He's doing "patty cake" and starting to crawl.  He is such a blessing to your entire family.  He is just AMAZING!!!  I often look at him in awe which makes me look UP to God in awe!!!  He orchestrated this all!!  What IF we continued to make excuses.  What if we STILL were trying to save up money and waiting for my husbands job to slow down?  I tremble to think of that.  

I promise you this.  If God is calling you to adopt, He won't leave you.  He'll be there not only next to you, but in front of you, opening doors, making it happen!  Trust in His promises!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Take that leap of faith!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The Privilege of Homeschooling- Being Together

 First I am going to say this because unless you know me you may be thinking- well I happen to think public school is fine or I am public school teacher.  I AM NOT AGAINST YOU!  You do work that is beyond necessary it is the fabric of our society!  I pray for you and your students!  I am not anti public or private schools, but I am pro our homeschool. 

The above picture is one of the main reasons why we homeschool- I love that our family gets to spend so much time together!  We get to do math, hiking, reading, playing, outdoor exploring, chores, English, watching movies, spelling, Lego competitions, lessons of real life spending, saving, and giving, creative writing, history, and everything is all rolled into one. 

Now some argue that for this reason they couldn't do it.  I will be honest as it is not always easy of course.  There are times when we wear on each other or step on that last nerve.  We are not perfect and our home is not quiet.  However, we have memories galore good, hard, and everything in between. 

Relationships and facing the ups and downs together is not easy.  It would be great to escape and Jason and I have to guard our time together as well as individual time to get rest and retreat.  This includes date nights, Jason takes time to refill and so do I as well throughout the week. 

 I love that our routine can include a family day.  A day every week where we can all say no to staying at home and just go out and play.  We usually go to the theme park for the day- convenience and more cost efficient when you live very close to all the theme parks here.  Sometimes we go to a state park, play board games all day, or go shopping as a family.  Hopefully we will get started in doing some camping soon too (we got camping gear for Christmas). 

 We don't have to worry about what is being taught to our children.  We get to choose the curriculum, and divide the time between subjects the way we want.  We have the privilege of seeing our children grow and learn daily and be a part of that.  We run errands together and don't stress that they have appointments at different times.  We can school around that. 

HA!  We even homeschool year round because I happen to like staying inside some of those super hot days in the summer.  It also allows us to focus on different things at different times of the year.  Let's be honest- we have several learning struggles in our home from ADHD, dyslexia, auditory processing issues, sensory processing issues, and everything in between.  However, we can completely tailor everything we do to help our children as we school together. 

 I get to encourage my children in their learning throughout the day.  I get to see when and how they are making progress.  I also see the struggles up close.  It allows me to be "all in" and do my own research into how to help them and encourage them more. 

 We get to talk about world issues, community issues, and even our own family issues in real ways.  It does allow us to protect them from a lot as well, but not in the way most people think about.  It allows us to wait until their age is appropriate to share with them about things, but we do have real talks around the table about tough issues as well.  We are not here to completely shelter our children, but to prepare them for life through the lens of a relationship with Christ. 

 Let's be honest the field trips are great too! 

 It is something that started out as a necessity as our camp ministry life was so busy on weekends and summers we would practically never see our children.  Before we were married we talked that if it was at all possible one of us should stay home with our children.  It was a conscience decision that we both felt strongly about.  We wanted to spend time with our children and be there for them as our parents had done for us. 

Is it easy?  Does it all get done every day?  Is it perfect?  Do we always enjoy it?  The answers are a resounding no. 

Every time Jason and I speak about it though our hearts come back to the huge privilege we have.  The privilege of bonding as a family, doing projects together, teaching in and out of the "classroom", creating fun memories, and being able to be there for our children.  So even though it isn't perfect it is ours- together! 

Daily Manna

 Exodus 35 talks about manna which was a (vs. 31) "It was white like coriander seed and tasted like wafers made with honey".  I was thinking in my mind as I read this passage a few things that really hit me. 

 The first thing is that it stated over and over that God heard their grumbling.  I thought- now that I can relate to!  I know what it means to have escaped the slavery of sin and yet I still grumble.  I may not like the way my child is behaving, or the fact that I didn't get something I wanted, or maybe I want my own heart to change quickly and I feel like I am at war within myself.

But in this passage it says God heard their grumbling.  He didn't condemn them or tell them to shut up.  He heard them and took action.  What a mighty God to think that He hears us even in our grumbling.  In our "sour" attitudes He still listens.  Even when we continue to sin God loves us where we are.

Side note:  Maybe he gave them a sweet bread so it would sweeten their attitudes ;). 

 They could gather only enough for the day.  No more and no less.  God provided their "daily" needs.  He didn't say gather enough for the year or for a month, but only a day.  If they did try to gather more- by morning it was filled with maggots.  Sounds yummy.  The only exception was the day before Sabbath they were to gather twice as much so that they didn't have to work on the Sabbath.

Another thing to note is that everyone had to same amount.  It was equal (vs.16-18) "This is what the Lord has commanded:'Everyone is to gather as much as they need.  Take an omer for each person you have in your tent.'"  The Israelites did as they were told; some gathered much, some little.  And when they measured it by the omer, the one who gathered much did not have too much and the one who gathered little did not have too little.  Everyone had gathered just as much as they needed."

It blows my mind that God created a specific bread for them to eat that "just appeared" every morning and then melted away when the noon sun came up.  It is crazy!

The other crazy part is that they ate this manna for 40 years!  Now we just got done fasting with our church family and I admit I grumbled sometimes to myself thinking....man that would sure be great right now.  I wish I could.  Then I would try to refresh myself with prayer and asking God to be my everything.  To fill the "voids" I think I have in my life.

The Isrealites ate manna for 40 years!  Now it may have been great, but that is pretty ummm.....repetitive.  I know because of the other circumstances of not thinking they could take the promised land that they were kind of stuck in the desert for that time.  However it really was a time of refining.  Refining of the people God had chosen.  They had to learn to trust God with everything. 

So in this year of healing I am thinking of refining.  Refining who God wants me to be.  What is His desire for me?  It isn't something I can do, but rather something I can get only from Him daily.  I can't take it on myself, or try to do it all on my own because like the manna it is provided by Him and I can only do today what God has directed.  I can't create days, hours, or even seconds.....I can only live by His sweet provision for today and do my best. 

Watching our children fall in love

 Having 9 children has given us a lot of time to watch our children fall in love.  Sometimes it is smooth and seemless adding another child.  Other times it takes a little more work and intentionality.  

One thing that we did as we added more children to our family is to talk about it at the dinner table, at prayer times, and during play time.  Who do you think God will bring into our family?  What will they look like?  What toy do you think will be their favorite?  

 In a lot of ways this helps give your children already in your home a part in adoption process.  Although growing up our children may not have always understood fully what was going on, they knew bringing home another child was exciting.  Making special trips to the store as a family with your children and allowing them to pick out items for their sibling.  Including them in on conversations about how fun it will be to have another sibling.  That now they got to be a huge help to you in caring for the next child.   

 Making sure they know that another child doesn't mean they are not wanted, but instead that they got to move into the "older child" position.  This is where you have to be careful to read your child.  In all the hustle and bustle of bringing home a new baby/child what can I do to make them feel special?  

 Sometimes we divide the children and spend time with just one child or just a couple of the children to make sure they know they are heard and loved.  It doesn't have to cost money just simple errands with them, a walk, or maybe it includes a special bowl of ice cream that you share together.  

 The reality of siblings falling in love is a reality.  Oh yes I will guarantee there will be arguments, after all they are siblings.  The love outweighs all of those because when you catch them whispering with flashlights in the blanket fort, or laughing toghether at a secret they are keeping, or holding hands as they run toghether to play outside.....there is no greater love that bubbles up in a parents heart!  

It is such an honor to watch your children fall in love and grow up best friends. 

Just an average family......

 Sometimes people see our family and think- WOW!  That explanation in an of itself actually makes me panic.  It's like there are set expectations already there.  Either I have to be a super mom and Jason a super man, or just that we are so very different than anyone no one can relate. 

 The whole no one can relate is hard for us.  It puts a barrier between us and most families.  A lot of people are afraid to even come to a meal, invite us over, or get to know us.  It's not always true, but for the most part we are outside the box. 

 So here are some facts about our family.  Maybe we aren't so different than you after all? 

 We love our theme park trips!  We have some of us who are total thrill seekers and will ride anything we are tall enough for!  Some hang out around the stroller and just like the less intense rides and special snacks we get on our days out.  We typically go to a theme park once a week.  Wait- what? 

Yes we have what we call family day during the week when everyone else is at school. For us we want to take a day out from everything else and spend it doing fun things together.  Sometimes we go to a local park for the day.  Sometimes we stay at home for the day playing games.  Soon we will start trying out camping in a tent too!  So we don't always go to a theme park, but it is a family favorite! 

Of course it helps that we live on the East side of Tampa- an hour from Orlando theme parks and 20 minutes from Busch Gardens here in Tampa.  Plus as a Florida resident we get better pricing on year round passes ;).  We use our Christmas money from family to help pay for those memories- money well spent! 

 This guy right here has to be fed and given meds daily.  However, we are working on self feeding!  In this pic he is putting a chip to his mouth and licking it!!!  YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  He loves to play with toys that make music and bang on things.  He loves to swing, read books, snuggle, and laugh.  Although he needs a lot of extra care we just think of him as the cute little guy that we all adore! 

 Ahhhhhh....... this is our yard!  Can I just say this is the reason we moved here!  Our own piece of space and trees and chill.  3 acres to run crazy or relax in a hammock. 

 We love playing board games- Clue, Monopoly, Ticket To Ride, Candyland, and all the other classics.  We also love cards games like Uno, Phase 10, Skippo, and others.

 Now this is Christmas, but this is what we do daily three times a day.  Sit at the table and eat together.  I won't lie- it is loud!  Sometimes too loud, but then again there are several of us.  All of us with opinions and thoughts. 

 We like to be creative and have fun.  We have a "clean room & bathroom" competition between the boys and girls.  Whoever wins the most nights during the week- they get to stay up late and watch a movie, or sometimes we offer other prizes instead. 

Sometimes the kids leave me crazy fun notes with scripture or just something fun for me to read.  I love it! 

 When Jason redid the kids' rooms we did chalk boards on the inside of their rooms on the closet doors and the entry door.  It makes for great entertainment. 

 We have 3 pets- no pics on my phone this moment sorry.  We have a small 8lb black dog named Crumpet who lives inside.  We have an orange cat missing part of his tail that likes to roam inside and outside named Rascal.  Sometimes when Rascal is inside he and the dog are much louder than the kids!  We also have a larger 50lb outdoor black dog named Sampson. 

 Sometimes we eat the turkey off the bone on Christmas Day or Thanksgiving Day. 

 But I mean this face!!!!  You still can't resist! 

 Overall we are a totally normal family! 

 For real!!!!

 OK so I am not sure I convinced anyone that we are normal.  Sometimes we aren't because when we go anywhere we pile into a 15 passenger van.  We are definitely loud!  Sometimes we are passionate with our opinions and having 4 teens and a couple preteens can add to that. 

We love the Lord and gladly share about our faith whether at the theme park, at Walmart, or at church. 

 Our homeschool days start around 8 or so.  We end around 3:30 with plenty of outdoor play time, indoor play time, laughter, and fun too.  We usually get up around 6:30ish.  Our new routine is that Jason and I get the kids up and then we head out on a short walk to just have time to talk without interruption for about 20-30 minutes!  It is amazing how much that helps! 

Overall if you came to our home you would see toys and books scattered, kids and me especially still in pj's some days.  You would have kids being mean or being nice.  You would find that we have many family issues and we have lots of love to give. 

After all we are just an average family.......