Sunday, November 18, 2012

What do you think are the most important things in adoption?

 Random pictures today :) 

So what do I think are the most important things in adoption?  This is not an exhaustive list as that would take years, but just something I thought I would focus on since this is National Adoption Awareness month :).
 One thing that is really important in adoption is to get to really - seriously know where God is leading you!  People ask all the time doesn't it burn you up if people aren't open to this or that, or they don't want to do a domestic adoption, or they only want a healthy baby? 

My answer is......thought through really carefully.  You see there are MANY and it mean MANY reasons people choose to do domestic, international, or foster care.  The answers and discussions I have had are vast.  Although it would be easy for me to criticize or tell people what they should do- I don't.  Mainly because our journey has taken us many places we never dreamed of going!  It has been a wild ride.  Each time taking us to completely new places.  I wouldn't trade it for the world. 

People, me included, are at different places at different times in their life.  ALL children/babies need a home including healthy light skinned, dark skinned, those with special needs, those born next door, those across the ocean, children that are older need homes, and those with specific developmental differences or those that have a hurt past. 

It is our job to listen to what God has for us right now.  We can't tell others they aren't as "awesome" as we are just because they are on a different God path than us right now.  Not everyone is going to be the same.  That is what makes the whole body of Christ work so wonderfully :).  I love seeing any family answer God's call to adopt- and am happy for each and everyone of them!  God knows what child that is made for their family......not me.  Praise God that is wayyyy toooo much pressure thanks. 
 I believe all families outside of God- need support.  Whether that is through a group at church, family, or a ladies group, homeschool group, neighbors, or even online support.  That is so very helpful.  We did most of our adoptions with mostly just online support- which I can tell you is super hard stuff!  Having people in real life like we do now is soooo much nicer.  Praise God!  Again, all of our journeys will be different.  So you can't expect what someone else has.  I think the important thing is to find out who will support you- emotionally, spiritually, and in person. 

For some this is a hard subject because they have had family that have said we can't support you, close friends that have said I am "outta here", or church family that have turned their backs.  That is tough stuff.  I want you to know that God knows.  I used to think how could people do that, but it happens all the time.  In times like those we can draw closer to God than we ever thought possible.  Doesn't mean it is easy though. 
 I think we need to refocus while in the process of adoption on our spiritual walk with the Lord.  I am not sure how people do it without God.  For me it is directly connected.  Oh, and get ready because there is a spiritual battle going on for God's precious children!  It can test your marriage, and your relationships.  It can make you lose your mind because while you are fundraising there is sure to be something crazy going on with your air conditioner of course. 

Whatever your way is to draw near to Him- through worship music, through Bible reading, through being in His place of worship with others, through serving, journaling, prayer, or any other of the 100's of ways.  Get in a place where God has complete access to your whole life. 
 Other things that are important in adoption.  Patience.  HA!  I say this, but really this is soooo very very very hard for me.  I stink at this part.  I want it all done now!  ;)  Pretty sure most of you understand what I am saying.  You want your homestudy done a few weeks ago.  You want God to show you what will happen and when and who and where - NOW. 

Oh, but trusting God with everything.  That is where we have to be....even when it is soooo very hard.  Resting in HIS peace.  Refer- to the last point right? too. 
I think the other thing to remember is to give yourself a break!  That's right!  Sometimes we just can't give ourself a break.  We have to work 24/7 to get a homestudy or dossier done.  We have to do it all to get the job done- ignore our husband, wife, children, or other get it done now.  See what's missing?  We need that support system and if all we try to do is do it all ourself and hurry hurry hurry we are not taking care of ourselves. 

Give yourself a break.  Because God did not leave His throne today.  He is still there and He still has this all under control.  He still wants what is best for your family now and in the future.  He knows everything!  So don't obsess and let God do His job.  :)   Oh and  that trust thing happens all over. 

Pray your weekend was great!  :)

1 comment:

  1. Please pray for my situation. I don't know if I'm supposed to be still and wait on God or if he wants me to be more aggressive in trying to do what needs done. I don't think waiting on the Lord necessarily means doing nothing. All to say, pray because I don't know.