Friday, January 20, 2012

While our little boy was being born.....

 So forgot to show you our English LOOT!  This is all the goodies my parents brought over for us :)  Yeah, they love us!  The big box in the front- tea, loads of biscuits I mean cookies, and candies we can't get here.  Well, technically we can, but they are really really expensive!  I guess that is the advantage to living near Orlando where 1,000's of Englishers take their vacations.  :)
It hit me today.........Our son's birthday is February 27th, 2010.  Literally a month before our Joanna was born on March 23rd, 2010.  I was remembering.....what was going on in our lives at this time.

Then it came rushing over me like a ton of bricks.......WE WERE IN THE MIDST OF OUR LOSS......LOSING OUR NAOMI CAROLINE.  We were in the stage of trying to move on like we would be ok.  It was hard work in those days- making ourselves smile, but we tried. 

Interestingly I went back and found this post a couple of days before he was born.

And yet just a few days before that......this is what I posted.

Actually......I remember feeling like just getting up in the mornings- was HARD WORK!  We had lost our Hannah Grace July25th, 2008 as she went to be with Jesus.  And although we know she is perfectly healed of her scoliosis and spina bifida not needing any earthly surgeries........we longed to hold her!!!!  She was our daughter!!!!  

Then starting in December of 2009....when we got the UGLY LETTER from usc*s stating they wanted more information?  Through March......we were in a deep longing, mourning, lost stage.  Because Naomi was never going to be coming home.  Those months were filled with grief!  A depression even.

While all this was happening- God was arranging for the birth, not only of our daughter, Joanna Faith Wright....but now we find out that our next child as well?  How can such a crazy time of deep loss, that is sooo unexplainable unless you have lost a child, lead to not 1 but 2 of our children?  I was blown away by our God!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

As I was praying God led me to realize one really important thing.  HE does NOT conform to our ideas of good timing.  I know that sounds simple, but it is true.  If you would have asked me in those months are you sooo excited about God.  Ummm.....I would have said yes, but right now it is hard to just live. 

Sometimes it is hard enough just to breathe in life.  There are times when we feel like we are suffocating with a kind of death.  Some of you may be feeling that way right now.  But God works in ways we can not understand!  I still don't understand why we had to lose our Hannah Grace or our Naomi Caroline- much less lose them both within 2 years!!!  BUT OUR GOD IS SOO AWESOME that HE KNEW.  He knew our hearts would be broken and HE HAS RESTORED THEM!!!  NOT ONLY HAS HE RESTORED THEM, BUT NOW THEY ARE OVERFLOWING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Does this mean that our hard times are over now - ha ha ha....nope, doubt it.  BUT it puts things into perspective a different perspective.  One that I am sooo grateful for!  During those times when you are drowning in pain.....you never know what God is up to :)!!!! 


8 comments:

  1. I have only been reading your blog for awhile and had no clue about your daughter. I love reading about your family and your new son. This blog is such an encouragement to me. Thanks

    thecuriousgeorges11.blogspot.com

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  2. Oh my!!!! What a great God we serve.

    Doing devotions today.... it said "Believing in God, means believing in His perfect timing." So hard... but oh, so true!

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    1. EVEN when your heart hurts so much you think it will BURST!!!! UGH...not fun. But God doesn't promise easy....just that HE will work it out.

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  3. English loot--any Lilt in there? My husband misses it. Too bitter for me. Wouldn't mind a few boxes of Christmas crackers (poppers). Need to find better ones for next year than the World Market ones. Maybe we need a field trip to London....

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    1. Do you have a home goods store? Ours had Christmas crackers and reasonable price :) A tradition in our home! You know cheesey jokes, paper crowns, and cheap gifts :) he he he

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  4. He is so faithful!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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