Thursday, June 4, 2009

Joshua David Wright

This will be a hard post....for so many reasons, but here goes. After adopting 3 beautiful children in Iowa and the moving to Louisiana. We decided that our family was know a girl 2 boys, all beautiful. We were adjusted, and satisfied, and yet...... Well...maybe we should take the class so we could help out a family in need (yeah that is God's way of laughing right- telling him what you plan?)

We decided to take the Foster/Adoptive classes again (because the name of the class had changed since we last took it in IA...we had to retake it if we wanted to foster). We barely knew anyone. We hadn't really found a home church yet, and really only knew a few people..and then there were these wonderful people that volunteered to look after our 3 babes so we could take the class for at least the first one. We decided that we would just do it and rely on God to provide babysitters for us. Lo and behold they ended up looking after our children for 3 hours every week for a month and a half! Thank you Lord!!!

In May of 2005...2 weeks before our summer staff training (we are Christian Camp Directors)....we get a phone call about taking in 2 children a little boy who is about to turn 3 and a little girl who just turned 1. We figured that the little boy may be a stretch because he is 6 months younger than one of our boys, and then 6 months older than our youngest son. But we were just going to help this family out until things were sorted....(there was abuse between the parents).

I truly believe that for the first year...and even a little while longer...we tried to be cordial, tried to really believe that they would go back home (to the biological family). But after the first year...Joshua started not wanting to make valentines for them, leaving them out of his family pics, calling them by their names instead of ... mommy & daddy, not wanting to go to visits, peeing his pants on purpose, hitting, and crying in a curled up ball for long periods of time. In his mind he had been lied to tooo much, and he wanted to be done. Sarah didn't really care because well she got her way at visits (once a week for 2 hours). She loved it, because it didn't happen here!!!

Well, the visits intensified and there was a strong effort after all this time to reunite. The problem was there was a baby sister born on Christmas a few months prior...and they didn't remove her from the home (violence I guess isn't supposed to affect babies). So they tried to reunite...for all those foster parents out there....they had in home visits (I even supervised one), and lengthened visits, etc. And we had our answer that this was going to be their home.

GULP!!!! After a year and almost year and 1/2 this was not easy news!!!! Especially when Joshua was really upset over it. And from there I will continue the story with Sarah & Elizabeth's posts because they kind of blend together...since the court case blended together.

A little bit about Joshua. He loves his name. I have never seen a child so protective of his name!!!! Because to him it meant I get to be here - in our home - forever! To him it meant no more visits! To him- IT MEANT EVERYTHING!!!!

It took him 3 months to even sit on my lap. He took my love....a little bit...very little most times, but finally after 3 months he came and sat on my lap. It still brings big tears to my eyes to remember that moment. It is engraved into my brain! He had outbursts shall we say for 3 months very intense and a lot of times more than one a day. It was like he would go into his world and discover he was not in his old home, and bust out!!! He cried, screamed, kicked, hit, threw off shoes, sometimes clothes.....I would literally sit there and pray (because it was in the summer Jason was in the kitchen a lot doing foodservice and I was by myself with 5 children). I would call out for mercy, for healing, for understanding, for anything to help relieve the extreme pain he felt!!!! After 3 months they lessened....and then trickled....well, until the case would turn a different direction, but that is a whole other story!!!!!

Another side note...this story is so huge and long...without a book....I couldn't share it all....

More about my baby......I love his smile. It sucked me in!!! I love his crazy sense of humor. He is sooo strong!!! Pure muscle and easily the strongest child we have! He is fast, loves to climb trees, and now a mama's boy :) He is eager to please like an oldest child, and loves his siblings. He is very protective of them, and I love his special connection with Jonathan. I think it has to do with when we told them Jonathan's birthday it is one day before his. Joshua LOVES to read. He is my child that will take books everywhere, and given a choice loves to read all the time!!!!!

Since the case was finalized he has really loved school (we homeschool), but for the 3 years the case was going on....not a whole lot accomplished. I thought maybe he would have some learning struggles, but nope, it was just the whole horrible experience. Since that has finished I can't feed his brain fast enough!!!! He loves it!!!

I want to point out that even though this story to Joshua, Sarah, & Elizabeth was horribly hard! I advocate fostering!!!!!!!! There are over 500,000 children in foster care in the US, and over 5,000 just in LA. So we need God loving families that are willing to hold HIS children in their arms even if for a while. (by the way less than 20 percent ever return home). They need the understanding that ONLY GOD HAS in their lives. They need people to stand up for them, to hold them when judges and social workers don't make wise decisions. They need people to care about them!!!!! Is it hard- YES, the hardest thing you will ever love. I pray that God will reach people's hearts to choose this difficult path, but a very very very very rewarding one!!!!

Besides...God chooses to BLESS us when we follow HIM, and that could not be more true that with our babes!!!! No matter what the difficult roads were to get there!!!!!!!!!!


  1. I'm so glad God put him in your home. It sounds like he gets the love he needs and is super happy!

  2. So fun to see your blog! What a fun family!

  3. I know God is smiling at you and your sweet children. God has blessed your obedience. Blessings